i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Randomize
