I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I still have a little drunk in my system
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
