Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
