fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
