Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
