so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
