I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
