The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
the day after is always just damage control
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
