How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize