she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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