From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
