I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize