doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
