Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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