Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize