Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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