why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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