I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Michael Bay diarrhea
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
