Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
im drinking this country out of the recession.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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