Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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