Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
40s are totally the cure
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize