as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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