There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
