The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
