giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
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