Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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