I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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