Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Randomize
