Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
