I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize