wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
