you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
