It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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