plz talk dirty to me
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Randomize
