I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
