i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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