Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
