are you still at the devil's house?
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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