Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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