I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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