I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
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