Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
