Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
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