yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
