I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
