It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
