he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize