Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Your dad touched me again.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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