all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
