Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
