she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
